
everyone’s against me
or so I thought
had to get outta my head and out of the house.
©️MarcusCaesar

everyone’s against me
or so I thought
had to get outta my head and out of the house.
©️MarcusCaesar

I’m still here, but I’ve thought about it
Not being here.
Driving on an overpass, how quick to jump
This too shall pass.
Looking at the bottle of pain pills, easy
Takes the pain away.
Looking into the future, it’s not clear
Sadly it’s filled with fear.
Injured from years Dr’s say neglect
And yet
I’m writing this. Am I the strong friend
The one no one checks on. Sometimes
take it day by day, telling the enemy go
away . I don’t want none of your time,
I got mine and I’m gonna be fine.
I learned of a local news reporter today
Who took her life, didn’t know her but
Tears automatically.
On a random night in ICU , i was there
Asking God to take me away
The toughest headache, the sharpest nerve
Pain, more drugs came, the feeling left
For a second.
The point is I’ve been there no judgement
What gets me through?
I’ve asked forgiveness for the wretched
Person i was to merge with the grown up
Man i am today.
Music also has been a great relief, songs
That have preached to me, spoken to me
One such song is the title to this freewrite
“Hold up the light” 3 amazing voices I
Heard talking to me and i thought
Maybe I’m the light? Is this what I’m here
For? Love, Light ,Fight for what’s right?
IDK life is crazy man. You still got me.
I ask for guidance Universe. let me be your
Vessel. I ask humbly to be a light in this
World of darkness…..
©️MarcusCaesar
shook up and scared
want to call someone
feels like no one cares
they say pray on it
don’t let your mind stay on it
coming out
easy for some, harder for others
mixed messages in media
i wanna use Expedia
to get away far away
fairy don’t you weep, you talented
kind, original blooming orchid
your tribe is waiting
anticipating, getting to know you
witness
for you are a gift to the world fairy boy.
©️Marcus Caesar

received news
not good
cosmic redirection
take a breath
not the end of the world
learning, hoping, praying
what else can you do?
©️MarcusCaesar

sitting, standing, lying down
the world still goes round
i’m searching, i’m contemplating
patiently waiting for
me to see what others see
bask in that glow
i’m not my thoughts
negative some(most) times they are
learning and growing
i’m yearning to who i am
forgiveness, grace, deep but buried
love shows as the crowd roars
sometimes love is poetry
writing thoughts out…hard
but when it comes a flowing
that’s love
did you?
©️Marcus Caesar
Fast foods, Snackfoods, good foods, bad foods
It’s my armor
Invisible, seen, antisocial, mean
I choose this
Hard to quit, Easy to get, goes down smooth
It’s how I cope
Sexuality, obesity, debt, stuck
I pray about it
Love, money, purpose, relationships
It gets better, doesn’t it? Hope.
©MarcusCaesar
*i don’t own the image, Image is courtesy of google images*
Come rescue me
Depression has come calling
Loud, strong, impressionable
Feeling stuck, caged in you could say
Tell me something, make my day
Brighter, sunnier
Love letters to my heart
An elixir for my woes
Deep thinking, contemplating
Just letting go, leaving it all behind
Comparison is death at my age, any age
Oh sage, walk with me, talk with me
Give me the magic to mix this life
Into something I’d love, even like
Grant me the greatest gift
Of being able to see the world in all
its glory, is it by telling stories?
One year older, hair a bit grayer
I would like a sign for the piece of mind
To move forward knowing that life can be a
Challenge and the storm I’m in won’t always
Be this way, oh heavens I pray 🙏🏽
Your Elixir would be most helpful whatever
It may be, I kneel and bow to thee.
Be the guide.
©Marcus Caesar